Three Month Contractversary

Devotees of my blog will know that for the first two or so months of my being here I would often say that time was flying by very quickly. I'm not sure of the reason, but this is no longer the case. Time has slowed down. Maybe it's because I've gotten used to the routines, or perhaps it's the amount of time I've spent away from home.

Recently, I crossed my longest-I've-ever-been-outside-of-the-united-states threshold, and it reminded me of this scene from Lord of the Rings, where the characters are first setting off on their journey, and Sam stops and says to Frodo, "If I take one more step, it'll be the farthest from home I've ever been". Aside from thinking that if Sam makes this speech every time he takes another step away from home that it'll take forever to get to Mordor, I also empathize with the thought that crossing these thresholds is meaningful on some level. Here's that scene:

Being reminded of a scene from a movie reminds me that I'm often reminded of another scene from another movie. You know in the beginning of Casablanca there's that bit of narration in which the entire phenomenon of Casablanca being a refugees' city is explained? Well if you don't here it is:

Soon after the opening there's another scene in a central area of Casablanca in which a plane takes off - the plane that all of the characters wish that they were on themselves. They all turn their heads to watch as the plane takes off. I feel like those characters every time I see the planes taking off from the airstrip - which is often as the airstrip is very busy. I hear the narrator's voice in my head at the end of the clip above saying "and wait... and wait... and wait..."

Wow that makes it sound like I want nothing more than to get out of here. No, I'm not miserable - in fact it looks like I'll be extending my time here by a few weeks, so this isn't even the half-way point for me just yet (another week and a half, or eleven days, or 264 hours, or 33 meals, or 1 laundry periods, or... (see? I'm not desperate to get out of here...) until the halfway point).

Rain. 

The rain comes with a breeze that is most cooling on my mustache.

It's raining right now while I write this post... for the second time the entire time I've been here. The first time it was torrential and lasted all day. Pools of water gathered in ditches and stayed there for weeks. You'd think in this dry atmosphere it would evaporate in a day, but no. We're entering the rainy season, so we can start to expect more days like that, but it's still hot during the day and can break 80 easily. At night it's cold, sometimes in the 40s.

Mail/Packages.

My mom did not think that this suitcase was going to make it to me mailed as it was.

Over the last couple of weeks I got a few huge packages in the mail. Two of them came just today (Nov. 7th). It's really exciting to get mail, it breaks up the monotony as I've said before.

Seriously there was a windfall of awesomeness recently.

Even a simple card or photo (or a photocopy of a photo) brightens my day.

My desk isn't normally this messy, I just wanted to take a picture of all the mail.

If you squint, or click and enlarge the picture, you can see that the only one of my cousins with adorable children that has sent me adorable pictures of themselves and/or their kids has been Suzanne and Lee Appel. Props to them. If you're feeling guilty for not having sent me packages and/or pictures of you and your adorable kids you can feel free to send such things to:

Joshua Kramer
Kandahar Education Center
APO, AE 09355

It costs the same to send to that address as it does to anywhere in the US.

Things that taste like home.

This week the British cafe place finally had smoked salmon bagel listed as "in stock" on their menu. It tasted really good.

I mean, it was missing some tomato and some red onion - but I'm not complaining.

Delicious.

Poop.

There was a new sign at the poo pond recently!

Very clever.

Beard.

Let's take a look at the before-and-after.

Before, when I had a smaller beard and shorter hair, and apparently didn't mind having a picture taken of me with earbuds.

After, I have a bigger beard and longer hair.

I painstakingly arranged it so the flyswatter, the pipe, and my position in relation to the chair made for an accurate before and after setup - just thought you should know.

The other day, a guy laughed out loud when he came to me for help with something and I had no accent. True story.

OK, so there are these emails that go through a sensor on the special computer system we have here on KAF to make everyone aware of the same things. "KAF-all" emails. We get to send out information about programs and classes available at the Ed. Center once a week. This week, Christian included, sandwiched in between a couple of other bullet points, "everyone is invited to the Ed. Center to pet Josh's beard." The bullet point made it through the sensor, so either he wasn't reading it, or he thought it was funny. Hopefully he thought it was funny, because, you know... he's a censor. So far, there have been no takers, next time I think Christian is going to include something about it being good luck to pet my beard... we'll see how that works.

Until next time.

Skype

Being removed from friends and family within the military environment isn't the same as it was 50 years ago, or even 5 years ago. Now, you can talk to anyone you want in the world for free through the internet. It's incredible. Sometimes unbeknownst to my skype-chat peeps, I take pictures for posterity's sake - and thus this post.

This picture already prominently featured in an earlier post.

My Mom and Dad

Dad pretends to be a crotchety old man.

"Ilana smile for a picture", I said. This is what I got.

Grandma Lola learned how to use the computer!

Just kidding! Mom was helping her out.

Both Grandmas!

Willie and Dena say hi.

It's Seth! You know... from this post!

And Ari, he made it!

YAHHHHRRRRRRRRRRHRGHGHGHG - she's a pirate.

Sometimes I get put on hold when real life calls.

Jackie is truly honored to be chosen for this post. More on Jackie in a future post.

Anyway, skype and google talk have really changed what life "downrange" is like. Society has romanticized the notion of the "war buddy" for centuries, especially in American culture. I think skype has worn down that connection that soldiers have on some level. It used to be a soldier was in a remote environment like this and there was downtime (this is what I've heard and seen, I clearly wasn't in any war back then), they could write a letter home or maybe even talk on the phone for a few minutes and then the rest of their time they'd socialize with each other practically every waking minute. Now, the situation is if there's a moment of downtime that soldier can be in instantaneous communication with his or her loved ones often face-to-face, so he or she rushes off to the computer.

Not that it's necessarily a bad thing, but that romanticized idea of a war-buddy may be a dying phenomenon for much of the military.

Poo Pond

Government Shut Down Update: So the funding problem cleared itself up in less than 24 hours. Basically it amounted to a sleep-in and a trip to the bazaar. Phew. I was actually looking forward to a full day off. I didn't get to the intense work-out at the gym that I was planning for the afternoon before we got the word to head back to work.

Actual Post:

I've definitely mentioned the poo pond here at KAF before in this blog. The poo pond is a water treatment facility. You can see it in google maps if you search Kandahar Airport - it looks like a four-petaled flower made of poo-water. It smells, but I guess I'm used to it as people who are new to KAF have a more and more noticeable reaction to smelling the poo pond. Maybe when I leave here everything will smell so wonderful by comparison that I'll just stand still and breathe through my nose for hours on end.

Here's what the poo pond looks like.

Anyway, I took these pictures of the humorous signs people have put up near the poo pond edge. They are all variations on the same theme - that there are four extremely large pools of water smelling of poo very close by.

Hehehehe... dootie...

There's no yacht club here... that's ridiculous...

When I showed these signs to someone on base they said it ruined the movie Willy Wonka for them, making Augustus Gloop's elimination from the competition far more gruesome than it was to begin with... the biohazard sign isn't meant to be humorous.

And there you have it - the poo pond of KAF. Until next time.